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Way Out West

As a teenager in South Central Los Angeles in the 1990's, my life straddled two worlds. While I ate, slept, and lived in South Central, I commuted daily for school to Santa Monica an affluent California neighborhood. In both communities people noted the gap between their expectations of a young black man from South Central and my actual personality. According to them, I should have been a thug or a gang member working his way through the system, but nothing could have been further from the truth. I spoke differently than most of the African Americans in my neighborhood, rarely using slang. I read science fiction and listened to jazz. In my educated and uneducated worlds people either saw me as the Great Black Hope or a dangerous threat to the status quo. At school and at home I was an outsider.

My outsider status, coupled with the media coverage of South Central L.A. at the time as a wild, lawless place, led me to consider the cowboy. I identify with Hollywood's traditional gunslinger, the stranger riding into town idolized by those seeking his help and feared by those content with things as they are, the status quo. Like him, I found myself, as a very young man, pressured inside and outside my community to fix sweeping social problems, to make things right. Like him I experienced alienation from those who found my differences threatening and scary. The cowboy, our hero, is really just a young man trying his best in a violent, difficult world, faced with pressure from his allies and scorn from his enemies. His impossible position forms the foundation for "Way Out West."


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